Blogging

What to say…

jacquelineobyikocha3 Comments
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Advise to self. If you don’t use it, you most certainly lose it. Writing is like your muscles, when left to idle, they become flabby, weak, tired… I sit in front of my laptop with the little imps on my left and right shoulder squabbling to gain my attention. Arrgh! Said the imp on the left, ‘You no longer have the words. You can’t seem to think of what to write. Why not wait till early tomorrow morning when you feel perkier and up to the task of tasking your brain? Sounded like a very good and friendly idea to me.

Wait a minute! Squeaked the imp on my right. This same dumb reasoning is what has kept you in this rut all these days. Many early morning plans set for tomorrow have come and gone and we have lost count of the tomorrows. I don’t truly care if you’ve got nothing to say now, but say something, anything. JUST SAY SOMETHING. Each day say something, ‘cos I am tired of how I am compelled to listen to those nagging, guilt-ridden inner voices of yours complaining and reminding you that you have simply sat of your wide butt and done nothing about the thoughts dancing in your head. I have heard their whispered threats and witnessed your sad countenance. I am fed up lady. Say something, he or is it she urged.

So, this is me saying something; a befuddled attempt to get back to my daily blogging. Hope you are doing well? Happy Easter to you and your family.

Philosophy of Life · Self Help

It’s a new year after all…

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As always, the hand of time turns effortlessly and before you finish clinking your champagne glass, a day goes by, the 2, 3, and they all roll along to weeks, months and then its year end again, when we rush to meet deadlines, get to sing Christmas carols, feel warm and fuzzy and hey presto! Happy new year greetings are being exchanged once more and we are caught in the New Year resolution fever. 

Armed with good intentions, gratitude for the blessings of the past year and surviving the vagaries that comes with living, we eagerly usher in the New Year completely determined to do our best and to get the best out of the year.

A lot of us say things like: ‘this is my year,’ ‘this year will be magical,’ ‘I will have so many breakthroughs this year,’ etc. and the list goes on.

All well and good. Seeking to be better than we were and doing better than we did is always commendable, but the question remains, how dogged, dedicated and passionate are we to truly arrive at these demanding goals that we set for ourselves at the beginning of each year? Or are we just going forward making a wishful list without the backbone to see them through thereby leading ourselves down the path of breaking of resolutions before they have even taken off and multiple disappointments over time? There is nothing wrong with setting goals, but goals without the right systems put in place will place will most certainly fall apart.

As always, I say, live your best life in the moment, try to stay accountable so that you can be the best version of you each day every day in all ramifications and as the moments roll by, it is far easier accomplishing those aspirations. Of course, life happens and sometimes things outside our control happens. Nonetheless, it is not always about what happened to us that’s the issue, it’s about how we react to what happened. It’s about how we rise from the dust of a situation, dust ourselves off and keep pushing and most times, it is easier to pick up from where you left off when your actions are almost second nature.  

Think on these thoughts succinctly whilst attempting to revamp your entire life.
What are the deep lessons that you learnt the last 365 days of 2023 and how do you intend to leverage on them?

Happy New Year to you and your beloved ones’. May 2024 be kind to all of us.

Musings

Something To Say…

jacquelineobyikocha3 Comments
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So, the summer vacay is almost over, and we will be back to the bustle of school run, fees, homework, projects and what have you in no time. Time is so fleeting. Just a couple of weeks ago, I had made an ambitious list of all the things that I planned to do during the summer break, alas, here I am, nary a thing done except vegetating, creating my posts on TikTok and FB, reading a novel in a lackadaisical manner, entertaining the legion of characters that co-habit my mind space and scrolling the fields of social media. 

I had anticipated that the time out will bring solitude and grant me the opportunity to hear myself think, but the solitary moments that I had were barely silent to say the least. I found myself constantly fidgeting with one thing or the other, reaching for my phone ever so often and imbibing in mindless scrolling that magically steals one’s time. Thankfully, I have been disciplined enough to get in my daily walks, improve my form and indulge in much needed self-care which is never enough.

One thing I can tell you freely is that discipline is a daily task. It doesn’t come easy in the least, even when we have our best intentions lined up. I can tell you for free that social media is the thief of time, devised to grab your attention and keep your eyes glued to the screen. I can also tell you that on social platforms, I gained a lot of valuable insight which I may never have had the chance to do otherwise, so, it’s not all downers.

The absolute truth is that we now live in two worlds, the physical and the virtual and we must learn how to navigate both worlds intentionally to our benefits. 

Hope you are having a lovely day today. 

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kindness · Life · mental health · Musings

DON’T BRING WREATHS WHEN I AM DEAD…

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“You may not be able to make all the difference, but the little that you do can make a lot of difference.”

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Why do we have to wait for someone to die before we let them know how much we appreciate them and how much they mean to us. Why do we have to wait for someone in our lives to die in the midst of their struggles before we realize that maybe there’s something we could have done to make their lives a little bit better, even if what we can do is only in small measures.

A lot of times we shy away from helping others because we are so caught up the quicksand or miry bog of our own issues and life’s challenges that we lose patience with anyone else who comes to us with their problems. We love success stories but never the messy journey that led to the success, and sadly, if someone is not a ‘success’ based on parameters set by society, they often get lost and forgotten in the midst of a crowd.

In this week alone, I have come across posts of people’s passing – known and unknown – some were under very pathetic circumstances and caved under the weight of their struggles.

You don’t have to do so much to make a difference in someone’s life today. Let those you care about know how much you do care about them. Buy them flowers whilst they still live and not a bogus wreath to place on their tombstone or shallow grave when they are no longer there.

Musings · Writing

Welcome to my brainbox…

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You are starved. Famished for words to satisfy your hunger. Mishmash, mumbo-jumbo, incoherent and sensible words tumble around.

A meaningless mess of words that I don’t know what to do with, all attempting to fall out in no sequence whatsoever.

A search for thoughts. Scratching the surface of the mind, several impressions leading to rabbit holes; where Alice in Wonderland is waiting for a visit, where the wizard’s cauldron bubbles with mischief, where sanity beckons to peace, where desire meets passion, where laziness meets the propensity to procrastinate, where nothing becomes something and something becomes everything. Where…

Welcome to my brainbox. Where fun stuff and nonsense often happens.

Book Review

What are your thoughts about reviewing books? Is it worth the effort?

jacquelineobyikocha4 Comments

I have no doubt that book reviews help an author immensely. For sure, peer review and recommendations are influential. A review will help a potential reader know what the book is about and if it is something that they would find interesting. It saves time, creates greater visibility and higher chances of the book being found by prospective readers. Simply put, reviews amplify the books reach and ultimately more sales = more money in the pocket of the writer.

However, the crux of my post is not about how important reviews are for authors, rather, how rewarding is it for reviewers? As an avid reader, it presents an opportunity to indulge in your passion reading free books and earning from it as well. No, you are not likely going to become a millionaire reviewing books ‘cos from my research and based on the book review site, the fee paid for an authentic review fluctuates from a paltry sum to enough coins to buy yourself a cup of coffee latte per review.

With a 2 weeks turnaround time and often tough guidelines and as someone who is dabbling into book reviews as a source of extra income, I am wondering if anyone has pointers to offer, if you have had any experience earning from book reviews and what your general overview is? How rewarding were your efforts?

Inspiration - Motivation · Philosophy of Life · Quotes For You

Big Dreams, little mind…

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You

can’t

put

the

big dreams

of

your

life

into

a

little mind.

@beyondexisting.j

Don’t be one-dimensional. #fyp #perspective #change #tiktok #filterfun #quotes

♬ original sound – Beyond Existing
Inspiration - Motivation · Writing

Unlearning…

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One poor writing habit that I am working hard at unlearning is the habit of waiting until I have something profound to talk/write about and waiting until the feeling to write grips me before I do so.

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Waiting for such fine moments emanates from that underlying need for control and perfection, which is basically impossible. There is no right time and no other time can be righter than now. This scenario applies to millions of us who sit around waiting for the right partner, waiting for the right job to pop out of the woodworks and offer itself, waiting for the right time to exercise, to adjust our lifestyle, to start that course we are interested in, to start travelling, waiting, waiting, endlessly waiting…

@beyondexisting.j

No matter the circumstances, you are blessed. #fyp #foryoupage #joy #abundance #quotes #positivevibes #blessed

♬ I Know Who I Am – SINACH

We don’t have 100 years left on this earth to get around to doing those things we want to do and sometimes, I wonder why we are quick to get upset over minor delays that will save us not more than 2 minutes, yet keep waiting for the right time and are reluctant to make those changes that impact our lives more?

Time passes so fast, this much we know, and we can never, ever get back those days spent waiting unnecessarily. Waiting for writing inspiration is a fool’s game because inspiration can be slippery and may never come in expected ways. The longer you spend waiting for the writing genie to turn up, the further it slips away. I know that staying consistent is the key and that when we start writing regularly, with or without inspiration, inspiration eventually finds us between those words and sentences that we manage to squeeze out.

Family · Life

Left alone…

jacquelineobyikocha4 Comments

It’s been ages since I participated in SOC’s and this prompt ‘left alone’ for the stream of consciousness that I just came across made me laugh out loud and sigh as well, as it pretty much sums up my situation at present. Though I have been dodging writing about this situation due to my mixed feelings, but I guess this is my prompt to talk about it.

These past couple of months, we sent off the children to continue their schooling in Canada as college fees in these parts are literally untenable and you need to have heavily lined pockets to afford putting your children through college/university here. For nationals it is freely funded whilst immigrants have to sell some vital organs in order to get their offspring educated in the higher institutions. So, being that my kiddos are Canadian citizens, it’s far more reasonable for them to continue over there, to reacclimatize and to start charting their course in life.

Whilst on one hand I feel relieved that we have this major aspect of things sorted, I feel bereft at being left alone in the interim. I have never been apart from my children and their physical absence leaves the house far too quiet for my liking, that I have taken to leaving the TV on for background noise which is simply out of character for me as I am not much of a TV person.

Thank the Gods of technology that we can make video calls and talk for as long as we want. It helps to take the bite off the ‘flown the coop’ feeling that I keep having, but it is not the same at all. I feel lonesome and I miss being needed. I miss the warm hugs. I miss their squabbles and laughter. I miss the ‘mum I am hungry’ requests. I miss the delight that they express after enjoying a nicely prepared home-made meal. I miss listening to their ideas. I miss my shopping companions. I even miss having the kitchen dirtied up when they try their culinary fingers on one recipe or the other. I miss many things that a list would be endless.

I presume this is a precursor to what it means to be an empty nester and I can categorically state that ‘I don’t like being left alone.’ I look forward to joining my kids in some months down the line and I will savour all the moments spent together.

For those of you who are empty nesters, what are your coping mechanisms?

Frivolous Friday · Uncategorized

Friday Euphoria…

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Friday arrives here in the UAE and we all feel – I guess most, a sense of relief, elation and excitement especially as most places, except privately owned businesses literally shut their doors earlier for Masjid and an early start of the weekend. Of course for the Emirates of Sharjah, that sense of elation arrives on Thursday as they now practically operate a 4-day work week and 3 days of weekend which is particularly enjoyed by those in government establishments and schools.

I think the 4 day work week is truly great and much better way of creating more work-life balance, and I daresay it is likely that those who are enjoying this extra day of weekend perk are far more productive than those of us who have to reluctantly hightail it to work on Friday for just a couple of hours which is largely spent around the coffee machine.

There’s this psychological button in my brain that the thought of Friday switched on. It signals to me a whole 2 and half days of simply unwinding and minding my personal affairs. A time to put the alarm clock at bay and to try to snooze a bit deeper though my body clock has more or less set itself and wakes up despite my best intentions to get more delicate snores in.

Fridays through the weekends make me feel like I have a bit more life to live and not just the constant survival rat race. I am still trying hard to find my Eureka moment and a magical wand that will crack that code that pushes me to enlightenment, unprecedented breakthroughs, abundance and growth and to subdue the feeling of gravity pulling me down into the abyss of constant strive to stay afloat and not drown in the sea of bills and just these extra hours off gives me a sense that ‘I will get there soon.’

I suppose I have grown so used to the universal staple diet of Saturday/Sunday weekends that they don’t feel as euphoric as a Friday half-working day. Friday has slowly become for me, not only a day that I let down my hair and put on my dancing shoes – sometimes only in my mind – but also a day that leads to a much need soul-satisfying me time.

What do Friday’s look like in your neck of the woods?